Goodbye, Farewell, Leaving Is Hard To Do…

Posted: January 10, 2008 in Daily Blog
Tags: , , , , ,

Last night we said goodbye to some of our best friends in the world.  (M&M (TransplantingMe) are moving to Thailand, they leave today at 5 pm) It was a really hard thing to do, so I thought I would share a few insights I have had over the years when we either left or watched others leave… (some of these are inspired by last nights events, some are not, so those of you that were there, don’t read more into this than necessary!)

1.  You never realize how much people love and care about you until you leave.  It is so stupid that we cannot share tears as easily with friends we are close to unless we are moving to a place far away.  We need to get much better at telling those around us how much we love and appreciate them all the time, not just when they leave.

2.  Say your goodbyes, then leave.  If you are going to be around for a while don’t say goodbye!  Prematurely disconnecting is hard on everyone. 

3.  Finish well.  It is really easy to emotionally disconnect from people early on when you know you are leaving.  Resist the temptation to check out early, it is like burning bridges unnecessarily.  Be strong until the very end in your work, your responsibilities, your friendships!

4.  The grass is not always greener on the other side.  Be realistic about your expectations.  I over sold a place we moved to with my wife and my kids once promising them great opportunities and good times.  It was not what I had told them it would be, so be realistic about your move, and don’t oversell it or put too much expectation in it.  Sometimes life is life, sometimes the grass is green, sometimes it isn’t… be willing to roll with it or don’t leave.

5.  Keep relationships strong with lots of communication.  You will need your friends, even if they are in another state or another country.  It is hard to start over in a new place, keep connected to people from your past that give you life.  It will take a while for the people you are meeting and developing relationship with to know you like the people you have had all that with already.  Keep all your relationships strong.

Okay, I will stop ranting now.  We will always be close to this family that left, regardless of the distance so it is not all bad.  They are going to do great things far away, but they will always be part of who we are.

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